There will be much speculation surrounding this post, and I expect to draw more than a little bit of criticism too, but why not.
I want to take a moment to discuss with you in detail the very things that either drive the old-timers from AA or pull them to a drink.
There are two issues which I will be sharing:
1. The Return of the Alcoholic Ego
2. The Subject Matter of our Meetings
So the old dog just packed his crap up in his even older truck and took off? We sit in our meetings and spend a great deal of time discussing why we think John took a drink or why Phil hung himself, we blame the lack of meetings, we blame the divorce, the loss of a job or a child...sometimes we blame each other...I could have done more? However, the arrow often misses the mark. The return of the alcoholic ego kills more of us than alcohol does.
When we were brought to the rooms of AA we underwent a period of ego-deflation that left us humble and teachable. Some years go by and through sacrifice and charity we remain in a place of humility, a servant of God, do his trusted work...then something happens, we cut back on our meetings or there is an event that pulls us into another area of our lives and away from AA...(notice, that while before I mentioned us believing this was the cause, it is not...) Rather than returning to our place in the trench, a bit of self-righteousness sets in and we begin to say to ourselves, "can't someone else answer that phone." Now the once removed alcoholic ego has again stuck it's foot in the door of our spiritual life. It begins to manifest itself in all manners of selfishness and self centeredness. The end result is always this, we become convinced that AA doesn't need us and that we don't have anything more to gain from "those people". The separation has now occurred and while the drink hasn't yet come, it is not far around the corner.
They are not lost yet, but soon to be...make certain that we keep an eye out for this...
Stay tuned for part 2...Subject Matter in Meetings
I want to take a moment to discuss with you in detail the very things that either drive the old-timers from AA or pull them to a drink.
There are two issues which I will be sharing:
1. The Return of the Alcoholic Ego
2. The Subject Matter of our Meetings
So the old dog just packed his crap up in his even older truck and took off? We sit in our meetings and spend a great deal of time discussing why we think John took a drink or why Phil hung himself, we blame the lack of meetings, we blame the divorce, the loss of a job or a child...sometimes we blame each other...I could have done more? However, the arrow often misses the mark. The return of the alcoholic ego kills more of us than alcohol does.
When we were brought to the rooms of AA we underwent a period of ego-deflation that left us humble and teachable. Some years go by and through sacrifice and charity we remain in a place of humility, a servant of God, do his trusted work...then something happens, we cut back on our meetings or there is an event that pulls us into another area of our lives and away from AA...(notice, that while before I mentioned us believing this was the cause, it is not...) Rather than returning to our place in the trench, a bit of self-righteousness sets in and we begin to say to ourselves, "can't someone else answer that phone." Now the once removed alcoholic ego has again stuck it's foot in the door of our spiritual life. It begins to manifest itself in all manners of selfishness and self centeredness. The end result is always this, we become convinced that AA doesn't need us and that we don't have anything more to gain from "those people". The separation has now occurred and while the drink hasn't yet come, it is not far around the corner.
They are not lost yet, but soon to be...make certain that we keep an eye out for this...
Stay tuned for part 2...Subject Matter in Meetings
Why they go...