The fellowship today tends to lend itself to the idea that most everything in life today, all the heart ache, the troubles, the highs and the lows are associated (no matter how loosely) with recovery from alcoholism. This entitles some to share whatever they please in meetings under the guise that it pertains to their recovery. Let's keep in mind though, that we are here to share in the common solution, and this solution is much like math in that it must be shared in the most common denominator. That is, when we share we are to do so in a general way that is non-exclusive and simple enough to include the most number of people.
When specific problems are shared in our fellowship and are not generalized they have to the tendency to be inclusive to some and exclusive to most, leaving the other members feeling left out. It also limits the amount of experience that can be drawn from in the meeting. Perhaps you are Catholic and have been away from the Church in active addiction. You come to an open meeting and want to hear some experience from members who have had a similar experience. Only if you share this you are liable to immediately exclude more than half the room who are either non-Catholic or have had a bad experience with the church. Try this instead, ask for experience about God, ask how working the steps has lead others to a better relationship with God. This takes out a single excluding factor.
In the end we all share in a common denomination, alcoholism and recovery from it. We have a solution we have been able to agree upon completely and whenever possible we should try to share form our experience as it pertains to this solution. Having financial problems, what about the homeless person across the room? Does that make the fear of losing your home any less troubling? No, but would fear or the promise fear of financial insecurity leaving a better topic than the specifics of you losing your home?
Part of the reason the fellowship is experiencing such poor recovery rates is the simple fact that so many of us have trouble latching on and feeling as though we belong. This is due in large part to the fact that it has become common place to talk about our problems as they pertain to "our" own individual recovery instead of sharing about the common struggle and the common solution to this.
Up next...Meeting, Sponsor, or Therapist...the tendency for us to confuse what is shared where!
When specific problems are shared in our fellowship and are not generalized they have to the tendency to be inclusive to some and exclusive to most, leaving the other members feeling left out. It also limits the amount of experience that can be drawn from in the meeting. Perhaps you are Catholic and have been away from the Church in active addiction. You come to an open meeting and want to hear some experience from members who have had a similar experience. Only if you share this you are liable to immediately exclude more than half the room who are either non-Catholic or have had a bad experience with the church. Try this instead, ask for experience about God, ask how working the steps has lead others to a better relationship with God. This takes out a single excluding factor.
In the end we all share in a common denomination, alcoholism and recovery from it. We have a solution we have been able to agree upon completely and whenever possible we should try to share form our experience as it pertains to this solution. Having financial problems, what about the homeless person across the room? Does that make the fear of losing your home any less troubling? No, but would fear or the promise fear of financial insecurity leaving a better topic than the specifics of you losing your home?
Part of the reason the fellowship is experiencing such poor recovery rates is the simple fact that so many of us have trouble latching on and feeling as though we belong. This is due in large part to the fact that it has become common place to talk about our problems as they pertain to "our" own individual recovery instead of sharing about the common struggle and the common solution to this.
Up next...Meeting, Sponsor, or Therapist...the tendency for us to confuse what is shared where!
Most common denominator...