Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Is Acceptance the answer?

I tend to challenge this deeply rooted ideas in the fellowship that simply don't hold water...
The premise that acceptance is the answer to all of my problems today is no exception. While I whole-heartily agree with the idea that if I am in the presence of God's will (read if I in his will and not my own) then absolutely all that is swirling around me is of his doing.

However, my sober experience has taught me that staying sober is the answer to all of my problems today. We as a fellowship tend to lean in the direction of causes and want work on those, acceptance being one of those things. We want to believe that if we can simply be "ok" with whatever is going on around us, then we will be able to maintain peace of mind and thus sobriety.

The flip side of this coin is that if you stay sober you will increase in understanding, your relationship with God will improve and you will gain acceptance and tolerance against your will. The trap in all of this comes when we are simply unable to accept something, and there are certain things we should not accept. Is your foundation built to withstand staying sober despite lack of accceptance? Evil exists out there, the fellowship is full of half-truths, lies and predators. As our moral and ethical belief system matures, there should be things that we simply cannot live with and we should take sober strides to help however we can. I must also say that without a firm foundation rooted in staying sober in spite of all else, we cannot persevere through the struggle that will come from this. We must not let the idea of acceptance lead us into apathy.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Made a difference to that one...

Said the little boy...

Sometimes there will be blog entries that are nothing but inspirational stories that I have picked up along the way, parables that have increased in depth over the years...

An old man sat at the edge of a sea shore looking down the beach below.
Off in the distance he sawa small boy walking along the beach throwing stranded star fish back into the ocean. Curious, the old man wandered down to the water to inquire about the boys actions.

"Young man," he said "you cannot possible make a difference, just look at all of these Star Fish, you are just wasting your time."

The young boy, reached down, picked up the nearest Star Fish, gingerly threw it into the water, then turn to the old man and said, "Made a difference to that one."

While we cannot make a difference to the whole world, our actions can and will make a difference in just one person's life. While the trend is that if the work looks overwhelming why even try, think of all the good that can be done along the way.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Hope for the Hopeless...

"For those who are unable to drink moderately the question is how to stop altogether. We are assuming, of course, that the reader desires to stop. Whether such a person can quit upon a nonspiritual basis depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will drink or not. Many of us felt that we had plenty of character. There was a tremendous urge to cease forever. Yet we found it impossible. This is the baffling feature of alcoholism as we know it - this utter inability to leave it alone, no matter how great the necessity or the wish." Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 34

The grace of  God brought to the fellowship in 2001 as a hopeless case. I had made numerous attempts at sobriety without success and had seen all manner of professionals who had given up hope. My family had begun to write me off and I was in failing physical health.

The predominant feeling at this stage of my life was utter hopelessness, the kind of dark feeling one has when they have resigned themselves to the idea that death is inevitable and they must because of some masochistic obligation continue to trudge forward. When one reaches this stage of hopelessness,  it become difficult to muster any sort of confidence that there exists a way out, no effort seems worth it as all avenues have been tried and have led to eventual failure.

Now the dictionary defines hope as: noun -a person or thing in which expectations are centered.

I define hope as this: Hope is the product of our collective experience.
This means that as a fellowship there exists a collective whole, we as members have once individually been hopeless and were brought together through an act of love and given hope by those who have gone before us. As we become a small part of a greater whole the collective experience we have creates an even greater hope for the new person. We are in fact a living message.

Having been convinced in short order that you had been where I was and had traversed the pit of despair, I was left with no choice but to join ranks with my fellows and follow your simple directions, soon after the pain and fog began to lift and the sun shone through. There was now hope where I had once been hopeless...

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Just an arms length away from God...

There is an idea, a theory if you will that seems to permeate the very fabric of our fellowship and in doing so robs the hope, steals the wind from countless new people and old timers alike. I beleive today, as I was told,  that the program of Alcoholics Anonymous as it is shared in the spoken word and laid out in our basic text is a path to God. That it's consumation results not only a deep and personal desire to know God, but also in the reciprocating effect of that, which is the presence of God in my life.

Lack of power is our dilema, always has been, I am powerless over alcohol. Now the rest follows a very logical and rational thought pattern and process, and while few are able to grasp, comprehend and understand the complexity of it in early sobreity it works.

Through the surrender of our will the cleaning of our personal defects the amending of our past wrongs and the maintenance of these things, coupled with consistant prayer, meditation and service to others, we are given power. God channels his power through us to give us the Grace and Strength we need to remain Sober. We also through this process create a lifestyle that is not condusive to drinking.

Relationships are forged, pyshcic changes have occured, channels are opened, and while that does not ensure permenant sobriety, it does ensure a daily reprive contigent on the maintenance of this spiritual program. These things can be ignored, broken, and undone. Character defects can return, prayer life can become stale, sponsers can move and not be replaced, we stop attending meetings, etc. All of these can eventually lead to a drink. However the longer I am sober and doing these things the further from a drink I get, and the closer to God I become! Today there is hope in the idea that I am no longer an arm's length away from a drink!

Friday, September 3, 2010

Carrying what message?

I have been often challenged with the question...what is the message of AA? Perplexed and lacking a definite answer I have sought out what I believe to be the best representation of our message possible.
Now I have heard all manner of things, most are right but only a small piece of the ultimate puzzle. Yes, AA is a path to God, the steps lead there, freedom from alcohol, so on and so forth. But what is the message?

"God, I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!"

Contained in this simple prayer is the whole message of AA, in fact broken into individual parts this prayer contains all of our steps and the path to God...Let me explain.

1. God I offer myself to Thee
Within this phrase is contained the first 2 steps of surrender...Admittance of powerlessness and unmanageablity we turn our lives over to God

2.to build with me and do with me as Thou wilt.
A little more abstract but there none the less is the beginning of step 3-7 as we begin to clean house to allow for God to shape and mold our lives into the life we are supposed to be leading. These first two phrases blend together into a for of letting go of our old ways, accepting God into our lives and beginning the necessary changes to live sober lives.

3.Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will.
How are we relieved of selfishness and self centeredness? It begins with amends in 8-9 where we are able to first take an honest look at the harm we have caused others and make an effort to right those wrongs. Once those things are out of the way and we can begin to see that we have an impact on the lives of others we are better able to do Gods will.

4. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help
Step 11 and then into Step 12 this phrase moves. Our difficulties are never fully removed we are simply granted the grace, dignity and strength to overcome them through maintenance of a conscious contact with God. The changes in our lives can be shared with newcomers in 12th step work giving an abundance of hope as they are able to see the power of God flow through us.

5.Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!"
Lack of power that is the dilemma...He gives us power, teaches us to love unconditionally so that we can operate in his way of life not our own. With the bond intact and the conscious contact prevalent we strive to do God will (practice our principles in all of our affairs) always...

Our message is right there...